Season 1, as retroactively titled
And Simon, because somebody had to play the smart one
1st September 2021
Didi Duvall Rides Out
WE HAVE REACHED THE -BERS! LIGHT THE NEED-FIRES!
Also this September, Didi Duvall rides again!
I apologize in advance.
--
J: We played mage for a minute online, I made a total bitch goth chick named Azazel Ravenous, Hollow One, who owned a club called Poison Apple. I loved that character so much, and not just because people didn't know how to react to another pc who was just mean as shit to everyone.
--
A Promise Or A Threat
If our Mage game returns and we do a beach episode, Didi Duvall, in her duty as THE WORST, will totally get a Tarot Hawaiian shirt.
--
2.00: Character Generation!
25/9
Didi Duvall will return!
... once the new players are done generating characters.
 |
| Ksenia Solo in a Lost Girl blooper |
--
2/10
Our heroes Cara and Simon return!
... And so does Didi.
I eased in the new PCs - Alissa, an Ecstatic, and Michael, a Verbena - by mocking an occult thief goon's shoes before Cara drop-kicked him across the room.
Our hero Cara as Didi would describe her.
 |
| Holland Roden, who does not normally have Hulk hands |
And Simon, because somebody had to play the smart one
 |
| Rupert Evans in The Man In The High Castle |
And meet Alissa
 |
| Paris Berelc in Alexa & Katie |
And Michael
 |
| Luke Grimes in Noir State Beach |
It's nice to be back.
--
2.02: Theft!
9/10
So we have somebody stealing mystical artefacts and probably trying to destroy the spacetime continuum.
And worse than that, how does our girl feel about new coven members?
--
2.03: Dancing!
16/10
New Ecstatic works via energetic dance.
"I'm tired just thinking about that."
--
2.04: Helping!
23/10
"Oh, yay, an evil ritual threatening to destroy everything. Whose asses does Cara have to kick to stop this?"
"You can kick asses too."
"Aww, thank you!"
"I mean you can help."
"Oh, right."
And so we're off to find one of the artefacts before the scary ritual guy does. This might involve negotiating with a rival circle of Mages, and/or werewolves.
--
2.05: Inappropriate Helping!
30/10
It being the session nearest Halloween in and out of character, I'm not saying Didi showed up to the meeting with the rival mages in a naughty schoolgirl outfit, but she may have given the group a distraction bonus.
Sadly she could not persuade Cara or Alissa to do the same.
--
2.06: Archaeological Ignorance!
6/11
So Simon is now the proud owner of a water clock. But, like, a magic water clock.
Alissa the Ecstatic dancer and Michael the Verbena ranger helped Cara thump a bunch of cultists.
Didi: "Is it good that they're coming after the bowl?"
Simon: "It's a water clock! And yes, that means it's important."
Alissa: "Yay for us?"
--
2.07: Repeated Violence
13/11
Tracking cultists by the mystical traces to another stolen item, Michael points out a familiar looking goon.
Didi squints. "Hey, didn't you beat this guy up already?"
"You're right, I did!" Cara looks offended.
"They must be using time magic to heal faster..." Simon suggests.
"Cheaters!"
So now Cara is miffed. When she knocks somebody into next week she doesn't want to see them again before that.
Following some violence, the circle make their way inside the cult base and discover it has more rooms than it should.
Simon geeks out. "It's bigger on the inside!" Cara sighs and starts drawing a map. Did tries to get her phone to work.
--
2.08: Disappointing Time Travel!
20/11
Our heroes (and Didi) work their way through the building to find the centre, where a powerful and rather damaged mage is trying to turn back time to save the love of his life from dying in an accident.
"Okay, I feel bad for him, but hello Paradox..." Alissa says.
"If we try to fight him, is he gonna throw us back in time?" asks Didi, influenced by how much her player would dig that.
"Maybe if you ask him nicely..." Simon deadpans.
"Yeah, we don't all want to be stuck wearing corsets on the regular," Cara adds. Didi looks baffled.
The mage turns to greet them. "We won't take it that far. The day I need your help will be enough."
Everything goes Doppler effect. and...
"Where are we? Or when..." Cara groans.
"Seven years ago," Alissa confirms.
"Could be a lot worse, but we still better work the problem and get back."
"Can we at least go to a Bowie concert first?" Didi asks.
--
2.09: Taxis!
27/11
Alissa finds a newspaper to show the group the date. Cara was at a college track meet that day seven years ago so her past self is safely out of town. Simon hadn't moved here. Didi shrugs and says "It's Saturday, I'm sleeping at... somebody's."
They have to hail a taxi rather than get a rideshare by app.
"Okay, while we're here, we should use our foreknowledge of the next seven years to... um... wow, I really haven't done much in seven years." Didi frowns. "I mean, we could stop that demon cult guy from last year..."
They find the time mage at his house.
"I've been waiting for you."
"Of course you have," Cara deadpans.
Didi arches an eyebrow. "Really? You're a time wizard, how could you not - "
"What matters is that you can help me save a life."
"And change history to who knows what effect..." Simon points out.
"Of course. But let me worry about that."
"I really can't."
"It's true, if there's something to worry about he's gonna jump right on that," Didi nods.
The mage sighs, raises a hand, and they're across town... where a car accident is about to kill his beloved, and a dozen other people...
--
2.10: Heroics!
4/12
Cara runs in and saves the people in danger first, even as the Time Mage yells at her about consequences and minimising disruption and going for his lost love.
Simon confirms that yes, this is going to get a big widespread Paradox ping.
Michael and Alissa do the specific person saving they were hauled in for.
Didi uses her 'opening convenient doors' power to get Cara into the runaway truck so she can grab the wheel so it zigs instead of zags and hits a nice solid wall instead of a bunch of people. "Best I can do!"
"We need to not be together!" Simon shouts as the Time Mage gets to his wife and he can feel the Paradox charge hit.
And then everybody is where they were on that day.
--
2.11: Flashbacks!
11/12
Didi realizes when she is when she sees her hair. "Ohhhh no." This was her bleached bob summer.
She takes a moment to remember how her seven years ago phone works as she gets a call.
"Hello suspiciously timed unknown number..."
"It's Simon."
"Oh, good. That explains that. Where are you?"
"Harvard."
"Why does that not surprise me."
"Why, where are you?"
"Some guy's place."
"Why does that not surprise me."
"So anyway do you know why we're us seven years ago?"
"The Mage didn't calculate on us saving everybody."
"Are we just stuck here now?"
"The charge should dissipate. But in the meantime, Cara is in the Bay as well, so you should find her, safety in numbers."
"Okay, um, makes sense. Hey, can I change my hair or would that break spacetime as well?"
...
Alissa is also not far away, up the coast. And currently in a dance class, and then heading home, with high school on Monday.
Michael is hiking in Canada.
...
Didi gets a ride to Berkley and is waiting when Cara gets back from the track meet. She gives her a hug.
"So good to see you. Simon called and said you were gonna come meet me."
"And here I am."
"I like your hair."
"No you don't. Or I hope you don't anyway."
"Okay, well... I'm a freshman, I haven't Awakened yet - "
"Oh, me neither. There's a really bad party next Halloween."
"I'll be fighting a ghoul in a couple months. In the meantime, we should keep a low profile for the week this takes. Which means you can stay at my place if you want, and tomorrow, I should, ah, go to the game..."
"Ladies' basketball? Field hockey?... Oh my gosh, was this when you were a cheerleader?!"
Cara sighs as Didi squees.
--
Alas
The time travel episode Didi wanted
And the one she got
--
2.12: Cheerleading! And Time Ethics!
18/12
Didi may regret her pre-college-summer hair, but takes great glee in seeing Cara cheering and leading others to cheer.
"It's a good thing Jack isn't here, he'd be on you like clingfilm."
"Believe me, I know."
They manage to find Alissa, with help from Simon on the phone.
And she asks how much history they can change while they're here, beyond what they already have. Because this is a year before her mom dies.
Cara considers this. "Okay, but if we get stuck in our seven years ago lives longer as a result, I am going to start assassinating certain world leaders. Just sayin'."
--
2.13: Risk-taking!
8/1
So the circle help Alissa save her mom and it doesn't seem to cause any more Paradox backlash. So that's nice.
And Didi and Cara discuss Cara's knowledge that the guy she's dating at the time is going to break her heart in a few weeks.
"I can do something humiliating to him?"
"Better leave it. I mean, if I'm happy with him I might never wake."
"Aww."
A week passes and Didi wakes up in her current place with her current hair. She goes to look outside warily.
"Please no airships..."
--
2.14: Backsies!
15.1
There are no airships. So that's good.
But Alissa isn't answering her phone.
They find her eventually, having saved her mom meant she has now has two subtly different versions of the last six years in her history, and while she remembers the original clearly the one where she had a good home life is the the one the world thinks is real.
"Damn, really should have gone on that assassination spree..." Cara says with a shrug. Is she kidding? Maybe?
The group meets up to see if there are any other ripples they need to deal with. The Time Mage and his no-longer-late beloved are nowhere to be found.
And on to the next problem.
Which appears to be ghosts.
Lots of ghosts.
Didi: "Was this us?"
Simon: "Um..."
--
2.15: Yeah Yeah Yeah Boards!
23/1
With some people alive who were scheduled to be dead by now, there's a hole in the Shroud. Cara may have to fight some bad guys she's already killed.
Didi, when asked: "Of course I have a Ouija board. More than one actually."
--
2.16: Sugar Skulls!
30/1
This means a visit to some other Hollow Ones...
Didi: "I'm not guaranteeing there will be sugar skulls, but there damn well better be."
... then preparing of a ritual to find the breach...
Simon: "Let me get my enchanted compass, shut up it's not that funny."
... and a fight with a revenant.
Cara: "And I'm up."
--
2.17: Final Destination references!
13/2
Cara: "So we have to stop angry ghosts hunting down the not-dead."
Didi: "Final Destination style."
Simon: "Okay, everybody be careful around buses."
And the revived people's Shadows working with the revenant.
The Hollow Ones find the revenant and Cara cuts his head off with her enchanted sword.
Which slows him down for a minute.
--
2.18: Underworlds!
20/2
Simon: "We're gonna have to go in and seal it!"
Cara: "How do we get back?"
Simon: "Good question!"
And so we follow the revenant's shade into the underworld.
Didi: "Wow, heavy, everything's in monochrome."
Shadows are returned to being, well, shadows. Alissa's mother is restored. This gives her some hefty Paradox, but she'll be fine in a couple weeks.
Assuming nothing else crazy happens.
Ha ha.
--
19: Burglary!
26/1
Well, nothing else crazy happens... for a couple of days.
Then someone steals a priceless and almost certainly magical artefact from the museum in a way that suggests a wizard did it. And the Tradition tribunal would like to know if we have an alibi.
Reuel: Their authority is illusory.
Me: But they look so grumpy when you say that.
--
2.20: Auction!
12/3
So now we have to sneak into an occult artefact auction.
Didi: "Do we get to dress up?"
Cara: "Would a 'no' working even be possible?"
We get to meet many interesting people and not-exactly-people.
--
2.21: Sword fight!
19/3
Didi's night is improved by getting to "distract" one of the fancy vampires bidding on the stolen enchanted sundial by batting her lashes and flaunting her neck.
Cara's night is definitely improved by the chance to fight a sword duel with the Unseelie Sidhe knight trying to steal it.
Used correctly it can alter the day and night cycle. Vampires and other things want it, and not just to mess with Daylight Savings.
--
2.22: Gig!
27/3
And next, going to a gig. We are allowed an actual night off.
Of course it's interrupted by monsters. But only a bit.
And Simon brings a date!
--
2.23: Demon kicking!
2/4
And next, demonic possession.
Simon and Cara and Michael get to be mysterious heroic strangers when they show up to help, having detected the intrusion. Didi and Alissa get to be supportive and warm as the boys prepare the ritual to draw the demon out. Cara is confident and reassuring as she gets ready to apply combat boots.
Demon: "A great fury rises. Your world will scream."
Didi: "Oh, big surprise."
Demon thumped and banished but the reason it appeared still a question for the Traditions in general...
--
2.24: Hunters!
9/4
This week, a suspicious lack of demons.
Some ghouls, sure, but that's just a regular weekend.
And crossing paths with a new monster hunter. Who's kind of a dick.
"Well, darn."
--
2.25: Dickery!
16/4
Dickish Euthanatos Guy annoyingly finds a lead on the demon issue, so we have to go into a scary lair place and fight shadow things.
Easter special sadly lacking in resurrected religious figures, or bunnies.
--
2.26: Godzilla!
23/4
So, the demonic plan is to awaken an Earthbound demon sleeping under the city, and if we don't want a repeat of the New Bremen Godzilla Incident we're going to have to stop that.
--
2.27: Violence!
30/4
This week: violence!
Cara kicks a demon right out of the body he's possessing!
Simon and Alissa lay down a ward to keep the Earthbound from rising!
Didi trips a guy!
The day is saved!
The Council and that Euthanatos guy take most of the credit!
We're too tired to argue!
--
2.28: Boats!
7/5
This week: a descent into the Underworld!
There's a skeleton on a ferry and everything! (I blame Simon.)
And fighting an old dead enemy. And more shades. As in a city of them.
--
2 29: Ending!
21/5
This week: fixing the hole in the Shroud!
Fighting through an army of angry ghosts, with help from some friendly ghosts.
Sending the Earthbound back whence it came.
Yes, Simon took the opportunity to say "whence" out loud.
Returning to find that we haven't been knocked out of time or anything like that.
Going on vacation.
Game over.
Being THE WORST remains huge fun.
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